My life lessons in resilience

Hard times create strong people and difficult situations are our opportunities to build resilience. During these times we can reflect on what is really important to us. It is an opportunity for us to both focus and take control. Stress and overwhelm typically doesn’t happen from one isolated incident, it is normally a build up of a number of (sometimes seemingly tiny) things over time.

How we cope with stress and how we build our resilience is unique to us. The tools and mechanisms that we choose to use differs from person to person. We have a choice to lean on unhealthy coping mechanisms and techniques such as working harder and for longer or bottling everything up or turning to alcohol or we can lean on healthier, longer-term solutions.

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Here are some of the lessons that I have learnt about building my resilience (it is still very much a work in progress):

Change is going to happen – when we embrace it instead of fighting against it, we can focus our energy more effectively and efficiently. (This was a VERY difficult lesson for me to learn, I used to be absolutely opposed to anything to do with change!).

There is so much in our lives that is outside of our circle of control. When we focus on what we can control and change, we manage our time and emotions more effectively and it helps us to feel more empowered. Control the controllables!

We cannot change the past – learn from it and let it go (no matter how much we try, or how much we want to go back and change it, believe me I have tried this too!).

Life is too short to waste thinking about the past or to hold a grudge – let it go and move on.

Mistakes are always valuable learning opportunities and building blocks in our resilience.

People are amazing – talk to them and listen to their advice, their guidance and their experiences.

Always be learning.

Stay fit and healthy, it is good for our physical, emotional and mental health and resilience. Get outside and breathe.

Be an optimist – find positivity in everything – sometimes it is super obvious and others it is hiding away but it is always there. Look for the little things to be grateful for.

Feel the fear and do it anyway – good things never come from comfort zones.

Be the authentic you – always live life by your personal values and stay true to yourself.

To learn more about how to boost your resilience, you can sign up for our four part Science of Wellbeing Programme email to learn more.